Why there are times in life when one feels so lonely and it feels as if its the end of the world..
Maybe loneliness comes out of the situations which we create for ourselves and the expectation mismatch.....
Is it wrong to want unconditional support at times in life, wanting that blind trust and love where there are no questions asked, doubts if there are never raised??
And when thats not present, why does it hurt and pinch, creating dark corners in heart!
How tough or easy would it be for a person to live with another one, especially when that person views the things in only black and white, is so strong emotionally that he never needs anyone around...self sufficient....and infallible...
Is it possible that one can never do anything wrong and the other one is never right?
Shouldnt we take some time before we judge anyone, and announce them guilty?
I wonder...........................................
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Just wanted to pour !!!
Life at times gives us more on our plate than we can handle and somehow it feels that almost everything around you is just falling apart and you just watching it...
Past few months have been like a roller coaster ride and thinking back I am unable to figure out how much more worse could it be.....
Professionally things couldn't have been better...but on the personal front its just not happening...
Traveling to the client site in US twice in a span of 3 months would be considered quite a good thing.. I know there are people around me envious of this but then why am I not happy??
Why the pain and guilt of leaving my son and hubby back home so bad?? If I think logically its just another month, 28 days to be precise but why does each and every moment so long to pass???There is so much work that I can barely get time to breathe but then why I feel that void that emptiness....
Does one really forget one own self once you have baby so much that whatever time is spent apart it nearly kill you....Then too time is a great thing it goes on at its own pace....Either you are happy or sad it never stops............
Each mother who leaves her baby behind must feel the same pinch... each smile she misses eats into her.... then why do we do that??? What compels us to do so??
I am just so confused and unable to figure out whats right whats wrong...
My mom takes care of my baby while I am here in US working... She told me today that he has become irritable, maybe thats the way he is saying bring my mom back.. or mom I miss u.........
Why do we want to work? why is our own independence so important???
At times i regret working but then I am unable to find the strength to quit............
Past few months have been like a roller coaster ride and thinking back I am unable to figure out how much more worse could it be.....
Professionally things couldn't have been better...but on the personal front its just not happening...
Traveling to the client site in US twice in a span of 3 months would be considered quite a good thing.. I know there are people around me envious of this but then why am I not happy??
Why the pain and guilt of leaving my son and hubby back home so bad?? If I think logically its just another month, 28 days to be precise but why does each and every moment so long to pass???There is so much work that I can barely get time to breathe but then why I feel that void that emptiness....
Does one really forget one own self once you have baby so much that whatever time is spent apart it nearly kill you....Then too time is a great thing it goes on at its own pace....Either you are happy or sad it never stops............
Each mother who leaves her baby behind must feel the same pinch... each smile she misses eats into her.... then why do we do that??? What compels us to do so??
I am just so confused and unable to figure out whats right whats wrong...
My mom takes care of my baby while I am here in US working... She told me today that he has become irritable, maybe thats the way he is saying bring my mom back.. or mom I miss u.........
Why do we want to work? why is our own independence so important???
At times i regret working but then I am unable to find the strength to quit............
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Maid trouble again
Since Aarush has come into our lives, we had to take the decision of keeping a full time maid..We had little other choice as I needed someone to help me do the daily chores and also in looking after Aarush as I work full time.Moreover so since my in-laws were also staying with us..
And then came the daunting task of finding one..calling maid agencies, running after them to give you a maid..
I remember the first one I got was really good, but as is said good things never stay for long..She went to her office to visit her brother and never came back!!!
Got 3-4 replacements after that and none stayed more than a month...
I had to take a decision of forgetting my money and find a new one through a separate agency..By that time I had realised, its not important how good she looks, how good she works as long as she is not stealing money and is stable.......
Luckily this one stayed one complete year...and then as always had to go... and in a way I was also relieved as she had started acting a bit too smart for my likes......
Now started the next yearly task of finding a new one...and after about hundreds of phone call, I found one, though the commission was a bit higher side but I was desperate as I had to travel onsite for a month and needed help urgently.......
She was working fine till the time I left....and suddenly today morning hubby dear calls up saying she has run away...
And thereby went all the thumbs up I had given to myself for a well done task.......
Sometimes I wonder till when will this cycle continue......is there an end to it????
No one ones...I think this is life , one challenge after another, one struggle after another....
sometimes to get a job, other time to keep it, looking well after your kids, and most important
the struggle to be sane amidst all insanity...........
And then came the daunting task of finding one..calling maid agencies, running after them to give you a maid..
I remember the first one I got was really good, but as is said good things never stay for long..She went to her office to visit her brother and never came back!!!
Got 3-4 replacements after that and none stayed more than a month...
I had to take a decision of forgetting my money and find a new one through a separate agency..By that time I had realised, its not important how good she looks, how good she works as long as she is not stealing money and is stable.......
Luckily this one stayed one complete year...and then as always had to go... and in a way I was also relieved as she had started acting a bit too smart for my likes......
Now started the next yearly task of finding a new one...and after about hundreds of phone call, I found one, though the commission was a bit higher side but I was desperate as I had to travel onsite for a month and needed help urgently.......
She was working fine till the time I left....and suddenly today morning hubby dear calls up saying she has run away...
And thereby went all the thumbs up I had given to myself for a well done task.......
Sometimes I wonder till when will this cycle continue......is there an end to it????
No one ones...I think this is life , one challenge after another, one struggle after another....
sometimes to get a job, other time to keep it, looking well after your kids, and most important
the struggle to be sane amidst all insanity...........
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